its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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