that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Randomize
