just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
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