i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
