I CAN MOONWALK!
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
