How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
