i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
