we're blogging at a bar
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
it's like iHOP with fire
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Blood and glitter go together right?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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