So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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