i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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