smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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