I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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