Farmville is her only friend.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
