Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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