Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize