Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
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