You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
