you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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