yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
