Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Randomize
