I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
