I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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