Swine flu. Run for my life!
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Randomize