it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
