some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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