I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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