loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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