So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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