He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
