I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Everything about him screamed your future.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
