You really coming over, don't trick.
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
