How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
