I cockslap morals
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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