i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
