I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
