North Korea, Best Korea!
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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