I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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