i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
