i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
