i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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