By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
