I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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