He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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