quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize