You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
