That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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