Sponge bath it is.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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