doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
