I feel like I'm in dance class right now
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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