omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Randomize
